A La Natural

From the beginning going natural during labor has always been my priority choice. My mom and grandmother both did it without much of any complications. I told my nurse when she first asked me back in April that my choice was to go without medication. I scheduled a class with the hospital to learn about techniques, and looked into hypnobirthing and all that fun stuff. Plus, not to mention my fear of needles runs deep and the idea of one going into my spine doesn’t thrill me.

I had never really questioned myself, but rather the people’s reactions around me:

“You know it hurts, right.”

“I’m not going to lie to you; you are going to feel like you’re going to die.”

“You do realize it’s the worst pain in the world.”

Stuff will start to weigh on you for sure, and you will start to second guess yourself and your ability to do something that nature, your body, and your baby’s body had naturally intended to happen. I’m timid when asked if I want to go natural in fear of hearing people’s reactions. I have never really been one to let other people’s opinions influence me, but when you’ve never been through something your intuitions are a little skewed.

It wasn’t until this past weekend at my birthday dinner my dear husband had put together that I realized I was truly capable of this. We were all gathered around the Old Spaghetti Factory slurping noodles and strawberry lemonades and someone asked “So you going to go natural”. My response had become my defense and went something like “I would like to, but who knows”.

It had been earlier that week Michael and I had attended our natural child birth class so it was obviously fresh on his brain, but nonetheless Michael’s reaction was “No, Aubs you WILL go natural. Remember what the nurse said, if you're hesitant about it you won’t do it, and you want to do it, right?” BAM! Hit me like a tone of bricks, yes, yes I do want to do it, and yes, yes I should tell people I want to. And best part of all I apparently have the amazing support of my husband to do it!

If this is something I really want to do the first thing I have to do is say I want to do it.

My dear dear husband, how I love him so. Thank you for letting me keep true to myself.